I'm typically not one to share the intimate details of my life but I keep feeling a tugging like I should. The vision behind this venture was always meant to go much further than just selling clothes online. Don't get me wrong, I love clothes and they're definitely a daily necessity. But thats not all there is to life. Wow, I'm such a great sales person...
Growing up we were able to be free as children and just go outside and play until the sun set. Unfortunately, children nowadays and future generations won't be able to experience their childhood quite like we did. My heart breaks for the young girls who are already being exposed to social media where it gives a false representation of beauty. All the tutorials on putting pounds and pounds of make up, contouring the natural beauty they already have that does not need covering, comparing their bodies to the almost flawless ones who have thousands and thousands of followers.
Even I, have to constantly remind myself that what I see online isn't always real. People post their best days not their worst. But even at 25 I find myself getting depressed specifically from just what I see online. We can constantly compare ourselves thinking if we were just married, just had that body, just had that many followers, whatever it may be that you find yourself negotiating within yourself if you just had this or that. It is a battle that you will never win. Don't get me wrong, once you get those things you may be happy but it will only last a short period of time until the next "just had this.." comes along.
I had a timeline of when I thought I would get married and have children but God's plans were different than my own. I'm not where I thought my life would be at this stage and thats okay. Something I constantly have to remind myself, that it is okay. A few years ago, I was at a worship event at my church and the Presence of God was fully there. But all of a sudden I heard a voice inside tell me I had no value, I didn't have talent like the ones who were singing or dancing. Literally within minutes of hearing that, one of the worship leaders stopped and said "the word identity keeps repeating in my mind, do not let your past identify you or your current circumstances. Only God can identify you." That is something that has always stuck and been a constant reminder. I encourage you to hold on to that truth. Only God can identify you. Find comfort and peace in knowing that the only one who declares your identity is our Creator.
Matthew 18:12-13 "What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them goes astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine and go to the mountains to seek the one that is straying? And if he should find it, assuredly, I say to you, he rejoices more over that sheep than over the ninety-nine that did not go astray."
That verse is so beautiful, no matter how messed up you think your life is or that you aren't worthy, Jesus will always pursue you and gladly welcome you back home. Do not allow the facade of what you see online, your past, or what someone has falsely told you be what becomes your identity.
You are worthy
Currently Listening: "Until These Tears Are Gone" By Young Oceans